So in view of last week I wanted to continue our train of thought and talk about the Top Six Things We Fear Most When We Move Out (Or at least the top six things I feared most) and how to conquer these fears.
6. Church Hunting
I’m just gonna be honest and say… I hate church hunting! It’s like you’ve broken into someone’s house and are now awkwardly staring at them, trying to figure out where you might fit in. That being said God has clearly said in His Word (Hebrews 10:23-25) that we must never cease gathering together.
So a church hunting we will go!
But finding a new church in a new area can be a daunting task. So how did I conquer this fear? I prayed (always the best place to start), listened to the advice of people I trusted and then went. My employers actually suggested where I should start my search and their recommendation is the first and last church I’ve visited since moving to the Milwaukee area. I knew almost immediately it was where the Lord wanted me to be.
Another thing I would recommend is really just googling churches in your area. Normally their missions statement and doctrinal statement are on their websites. This can help narrow down the number of churches you have to visit.
In the end never settle for a church that isn’t actively preaching the Gospel and the Bible as the inspired Word of God. Everything else is just frosting!
5. Making New Friends
This is where finding a good church helps a lot! Check to see if the church you’re visiting offers a singles group or Bible study where you can meet knew people. Also you might think about joining local classes in your area. Maybe things you’ve always dreamed of doing but never had the courage to try before, like dancing or pottery.
I’m still working on this one since I’m not a terribly out going person. (I know shocker right?) But I’m proud to say I’ve made a few good friends since moving here and I plan to work on my shyness by trying some of the very things I’ve suggested above.
4. Loneliness
So this goes hand-in-hand with the above fear, but is slightly different.
Let’s face it even if you have a dozen friends you can’t spend every free minute with them. After all they have lives too and often different schedules. This will undoubtedly leave you with free time on your hands.
So what to do with it?
My advice is not to fear it. You will feel lonely, especially at first but this is normal. I called home everyday and I still do, however I also make plans for my days off. If I can spend time with friends, great! But if it’s just me I don’t let that stop me from getting out.
This leads us into the next fear…
3. Exploring
So you’re alone and it’s your day off and you want to see some of the sights your new home has to offer but… You’re alone. If you’re a young woman like me this can be a pretty frightening thing and frankly it should be. The times in which we live are terrifying, but if you just use some common sense you can have your cake and eat it too!
First make plans!
Sure doing things spontaneously can be fun, but when going it alone it’s always best to look ahead. You want to pick things you not only feel comfortable doing but the safest times in which to do them. I always google whatever I’m interested in trying, like for example going to a museum. I want to know they’re hours, where to park, if there are any special events running and of course how to get there.
Once you have your plan you want to set a specific time frame. So I’ll plan to be at the museum from 10:00 am till noon. Because you want to tell at least one person where you are going. I tell my mom all my plans. This may sound confining but actually I think of it as just a big safety net. I’m still up on the tight rope, which isn’t any less amazing by having a net underneath it.
Another good rule of thumb is if it smells fishy it probably is. I have driven past several things I thought would be cool that only looked sketchy when I got there. Just be aware of what’s going on around you and have fun!
(If you guys would like a post dedicated to just talking about exploring on you’re own let me know in the comments below)
2. Doing Well
So you’ve moved someplace new, maybe for work or maybe for school, but what happens if you don’t do well on your own? What if you just can’t handle the loneliness? Or the job isn’t exactly what you expected?
That’s when you need to realize it’s okay to fail. Not everything is going to work out the way we thought it would. And normally (actually pretty much all the time) it’s completely out of our control. In the end if you’ve prayed about it and the door was still open to take this new step, don’t you want to be able to say you had the courage to at least try? I would rather try than live with “should’ve, could’ve, didn’t!”
- Falling Away
This is my biggest fear and yet another reason why finding a Bible believing church is vital. Just because you’ve moved to a new place does not mean you’ve left God behind. It doesn’t mean you can suddenly do whatever you want. Unfortunately many people my age who have been raised in Christian families do think this. And I won’t deny there’s a definite pull by the world.
Why wouldn’t there be? The restraining eyes of your parents are gone.
So how do we resist this temptation?
Pray, Bible study and joining with like minded believers.
Sounds easy right? No! I can come up with all kinds of excuses why I don’t want to read my Bible- I’m too tired, etc. This is where growing in Christ comes into play. It’s a relationship not a religion. God wants to spend time with me and knows that sometimes I am too tired. The key is when I fall I get back up. I confess my sin, my shortcomings and let Him mold me into whatever He has planned.
I’m far from perfect and I would really appreciate your guys prayers as I grow.
And I would love to pray for you too! Just let me know in the comments below or shoot me an email.
That’s it for now guys. I hope you found this interesting and helpful. Again all my contact info is below if you need that.
Lots of love,
Tally
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